Last year, we previewed every player across the land. This year, the official Free Darko season preview foretells what will happen at every single contest. You see, in this Association of Professional Basketball, the parts are greater than its sum. No longer will we be subject to the games ESPN/TNT deem worthy of showing us (THANKS FOR NOTHING LAST YEAR, MIAMI). Each of us has league pass, if not in our cable boxes, then in our hearts and minds. Each Warriors/Bobcats game is as critical as Game 7 of the finals. And so we go forth, presenting to you how it will all go down. I'll set it off with October/November and the rest of the months will follow over the next few days:
Choice Excepts include
Oct 29 Memphis @ Houston. Darko Milicic, Yao Ming, and Hamed Haddadi sign historic peace treaty.
Oct 30 Charlotte @ Cleveland. Michael Jordan loses 100 grand betting on the Bobcats.
Nov 03 Golden State @ Memphis. Rudy Gay and OJ Mayo perfect a play where they jump up in the air, give a chest bump, then dunk the ball at the same time.
Nov 05 Atlanta @ New Orleans. Atlanta holds Chris Paul to a season-low 24 points, 14 assists, and 5 steals, proving to everyone why they did not draft them.
Nov 09 Houston @ L.A. Lakers. Yao Ming decides to be a jerk, only talks to Sun Yue in English. 83,000,000 Chinese residents watch the game at 3am.
Nov 11 Milwaukee @ Cleveland. LeBron goes for 80 points, misses free throw, Cleveland fans boo.
Nov 12 New York @ Memphis. During second quarter, Memphis fans tire of pretending to like Marc Gasol more than Pau.
Nov 16 Dallas @ New York. Josh Howard and Stephon Marbury chat and decide to start a PR firm.
Nov 19 Denver @ San Antonio. Smush Parker reinvents himself as a low post defender against Duncan.
Nov 21 Denver @ L.A. Lakers. Kobe's pinky falls off.
Nov 24 San Antonio @ Memphis. Popovich literally coaches game with one hand behind his back just to see if he can do it, Spurs win.
Nov 28 Golden State @ Cleveland. LeBron James decides before the game to begin the "Muslim phase" of his storied career.
Nov 29 San Antonio @ Houston. Texas Secessionist Organization gets group rate on tickets, becomes unruly during game, forced to leave during third quarter.
Nov 30 Toronto @ L.A. Lakers. Elie Seckbach interviews Andrea Bargnani about the true meaning of Hanukah.