I agree with this last statement. That is the thing: Jesse bit off more than he could chew, as would most people if they experienced everything he had gone through. If money motivates you that is great, but it is not everything. I say this because I previously knew one of my personal friends as a tough guy who you don't really mess with. He'll be quick to defend himself both verbally and physically. After seeing one of his co-workers get murdered point blank, he was never the same person. He went through a lot of mental issues for about a year and was never the same dude I once knew. It lead him to doing drugs and wasting all the money he had on things that kept him in a depressed, vegitated state.
Seeing somebody die on television is quite different than seeing it in person... it will mess you UP, regardless of how much money you have. About 1 in 4 adults suffer from an Anxiety Related disorder: PTSD, GAD, Social Phobia, etc.
This reminds me of Jesse.... witnessing violent acts in person, to have it later catch up with you, finding yourself spending all of your money on coke and meth. His behavior reminded me exactly of others I have personally known and seen it happen to... and for that reason alone, Breaking Bad is a plus in my playlist.
I never seen anyone die, but I have seen people shot up on septa buses (public transportation) while walking by and one of my best friends pistol whipped in front of me. I know this doesnt relate to what Jesse has seen, and it certainly does mess with you mentally. It made me a lot more paranoid certainly as far as having much of an emotional effect made me angry and what not, but a far feeling from depression. Im not trying to say Im an emotionless person but I tend to find I react very differently to many things then other people. I get teary eyed at funerals of realities just like anyone, but I have also attended funerals where I was going out of respect for my a friend or GF and didnt bat an eye, if anything they just killed my mood but didnt feel any type of way.
Everyone is different and I certainly see what your saying about Jesse. I just dont agree with the way he handles things. I know a lot of people say money dont buy happiness, but when you grow up below the poverty line that doesnt seem true at all. Even as a kid when I just had 5 bucks in my hand I felt much better, and now that is what motivates me in life. If I had a few million like I said I dont think what got Jesse would get to me at all, so thats why I dont like the character can't relate to him.